Dark Sunday

Just when you thought the lil' one is getting the routine right after months of deprived sleep, and you are feeling proud of yourself as you slip into the comfort zone, the whole family went back to the drawing board as we figure out how to cope with a sick baby. It all started one Sunday night, when the fever shot up and we realised that the stinking ear thermometer we have sucks. I went to buy another snazzy one that is easy to use, not knowing that regular (every 15 -30 mins to be exact) temperature-taking become the only thing on our mind for the next one week, coupled with wetting of forehead, bouts of bad tempers, coping with a baby that don't want to drink or eat, and scream till he lost his voice (and can only croak), and a general sense of guilt, helplessness and exasperation. We visited two docters, got the same diagnosis (viral) and instructed to wait out. Got more desperate when baby's temperature is as stable a seismograph plotting an earthquake, and our emotions racing across the spectrum of euphoria to depression and back. During this period, his favourite toy was the cheapest one we bought, a plasticky rattle of sort with a smiley face imprint that makes an irritating eee-ooor sound as you shake it. It's his only source of comfort during this period. And being responsible parent, my wife and me decide to go ahead with our holiday plans on the seventh day. Cool. Well we did call back, and in Bangkok, gave 100Baht to a half-blind lady cradling a visibly sick child wrapped in blankets and a wet towel on his forehead on a chilly wet evening. We could emphatise for one, and she was grateful and shocked. I pray for her and the child, and hope both boys (hers and mine) can get well soon. 

Baa-Baa

Sometimes, you dunno whether this is going a tat too fast. The little one has been talking to himself for two week or so now, alternating between "baas" (which I delude myself that he is calling me) and "maas" (mum?). Pretty chatty, talking in his bed, talking when he sits alone behind the car, laughing to himself - pretty amusing. Coming to 8 months, he looks like his almost one - what's up with babies nowadays - they all huge - they should start changing the baby clothes tag. I am buying clothes that say 12 -16 months since he was 6 months old. Wonder whether it's what he drinks (Similac) or what his parents eat? He's also sitting up on his own now - on baby chair, here's a pic of him at MacDonalds. The day he starts asking for fries... darn. 

TEETH IT!

The little guy is teething. Other than being cranky and grouchy, teething is not much an issue. But he has this little white spot that looks like an ulcer by his two front teeth. We were pretty worried. One pediatrician told us it was another tooth as it felt hard, but three teeth at one go? That's rare. Like all first-time super worried like hell about anything parents, we went for a second opinion - this time to a dentist. The tooth doc told us it was just cavity tissue, nothing to be worried about. Well you gotta trust a tooth expert on this.

GIMME MY MILK

Babies can really drink. At least mine can. At 3 weeks when he started to drink 4 ounces, we know we have a glutton in the making. Now that he is 5.5 months, yesterday he emptied one bottle of 7 ounces milk plus half a scoop of cereal. Everyone's impressed except my wallet. Yep, he's drinking Similac, one of the most expensive milk around and downing a big can every 2 weeks. Note that I have a babysitter, and i need to buy two of everything. That's double the price! Well at least he is growing fast physically and mentally. So much so that I think he is too smart for his age. We now call him the "Great Pretender", cos' that's what he does best - pretend to cry. He can pretend so hard that tears would trickle down. But break into a sly half smile when he finally got your attention. He tries it on everyone 'cept us, cos' he kinda knows that we dun buy it. Ha Ha. Why- cos' we have a dog that does the same thing i.e. pretend to whine and yelp in pain even before I try to punish her.

 

AH TU (AKA RABBIT)

This must be one of the best buys for En, his first security blankie with a rabbit head, aptly named "Ah Tu" (aka rabbit). When En was about 3 to 4 months or so, he would kick up a massive tantrum between the D-hour of 8 to 9pm. Nobody would believe us when we tell people so, until they see it for themselves. My parents went to the temple to get some charms to put under his bed, my father-in-law analysed En's room and drilled it down to a inauspicious painting. Well, we reckoned it could be due to sudden change of environment as that was also the time when we bring him home from the babysitter - so we bought him a security blankie so that there is always something familiar by his side when he go from place to place. It kinda work. There are many security blankie in the market, the most famous being Okie, a blankie with a knot for its head. I am not comfortable with Okie cos' it looks like, well, a ghost. Damn scary. So we bought one with rabbit head instead. Looks cute ain't it. The fantastically 'obiang' yet literal name was given by Ros, En's godma. Love it.

BABIES OF THE HOUSE

Over the 10 months of pregnancy, we had to fend off questions after questions about how pets and infants don't go, and we should get rid of Momo, the first baby of the house in case En suffer from asthma. It never ends. Today, people still gape at how En can "survive" with a dog at home. The only supportive people we encountered were other pet-lovers and an owner of a pet shop who claimed that mothers who have dogs will pass certain immunities to their infants. Well, being pet lovers, we tend to believe the latter group. Luckily we did. Momo proved to be a superb help - barking to alert us when En cries, and has a comforting presence when we are traumatised by En's antics! When En's cognitive skills developed, he started to have a keen interest in Momo, and eyeing her wherever she goes. Quite interesting. Well, we have two lovable babies at home :) 

BOTAK HEAD

We never had the intention to cut En's hair cos' he had lots of them when he was borned and they were brown and silky. However, when he started to pull his hair when he was about 3 months, they started to tangle up. Moreover, there were dry yellowish pigment on his scalp which we reckoned was cradle cap. According to our babysitter, shaving off the hair would be the most effective way to get rid of the cradle crap, so we had no choice but did it. We didn't bear to bring him to the hairdresser (luckily we didn't, apparently he wailed), so we got the babysitter to do it. We had a shock and a good laugh when she sent as a MMS of En without hair. It was prickly but after a while we found it quite cute. So for a while, he was ridiculed and nicknamed "Botak head" (Malay for bald). It also became obviuos that he was flat on one side of the head cos' that boy only sleep on one side! Anway, he thought it was fun (with all the burst of laughter when people sees him) and seemed more jovial without hair! Good thing is the cradle cap really disappeared soon after, cheaper than buying special shampoo for cradle cap.

Character Building

Feeding babies build character. You need patience, lots of patience. Baby En is difficult to feed nowadays, he keeps spitting milk thinking it is fun and cries when we try to feed him when all he wants to do is sleep.So it will be feed half an ounce, cry, pacify, feed again in that order. Doing it a few times, he will eventually feed, but this process will make your blood boil. I know better than give up before he finishes his milk. Experience has taught me that half fed baby will give you hell in the middle of the night i.e. he will wake up every one or two hours cos' he has a half empty stomach. So I would rather endure, be patient and make sure he slurp it all up.

2nd Trimester Getaway!

Well, it is no secret that 2nd trimester is the honeymoon period for mummies-to-be. So my wifey grab the chance to demand for a holiday. Well, might as well with the hectic schedule and bad moods. Thus we packed our bags (not too heavy and no backpacks!) and head for France to leech on our dear aunty and her family in Paris (love her!). Well, it was a great choice cos' my aunty took real good care of wifey, making sure she ate well and sleep well, and I don't go overboard with the walking and sightseeing. We attribute Baby En's good health, looks and fun demeanour to that fantastic trip. We stayed 3 weeks ... visited Paris (Lourve, Picasso museum, Parc Asterix), Bloir (Loire Valley), St Malo (Britanny - home of wifey's favourite crepes) and the famous Mont-St-Michel. It was great fun, good food, relaxing pace, good lodging (something she can't complain about now).. one of the best holidays. The only down side - faulty camera that churns out grainy photos.

Thus, all fathers - go for the hols - it's worth it. At least you won't get nagged, and making her happy during pregnancy save you a lot of trouble, grouses, complaints, flares during the term and after birth. And trust me, it will be sometime when u will travel abroad again (discount JB). But remember - it's meant to be a relaxing trip, not the travel groupies where u wake up at 5 a.m. and drive for 10 hours to see a lake type. Don't be too ambitious.

The Baby Book Curse

Many new parents are suckers for baby books. Like all men, I am not a fan of baby books and choose not to read them unless something crops up. During the 9 months of labour, this nonchalant attitude towards the discourse by baby knowledge thru' literature was interpreted as - well, nonchalent. I prefer ‘on-the-job’ practical training, and to-date I manage to survive without them. And baby books almost cost me my baby’s life. When baby En came back from the hospital, he had slight jaundice. Following strictly to the baby book, we decided not to feed him other liquids while my wife breastfed him despite protest from the confinement lady. Well, with no liquid intake to wash out the bilirubin, his jaundice rose to dangerous levels and he had to be admitted to the hospital on the 3rd night. We were so guilty. The nurse scolded us for not going on instincts, and said that baby books are written by and for “ang-mohs” (Caucasian mothers) who naturally have a ready source of breast milk than Asian mothers. Well, the baby book should have disclaimer! Photo by Attitude Photography

THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT

 

Ok, ever had trouble with feeding your baby at night, when he just wanna sleep and don't want to be fed! The poor soul who wake up so dutifully to ensure that this little thing is fed is met with a stone wall, a mouth that refuses to suckle the damn teat! Well, there is no short cut. The only solution is patience and lots of love. My ammo - a cup with hot water to keep the milk warm (a warmer would be nice), the baby's pacifier - to plug his wails so that the wifey is not woken up, the hanky - in case he regurgitate from all that wailing and lotsa of stamina. Basically, when he starts the cry engine while feeding, insert the pacifier (or thumb if you don't use pacifier - which i don't know why). Pat him until he enters the "daze mode" and then try to insert the teat again... sooner or later the baby will give up and slowly suckle till he sleeps or while he sleeps! And I promise, this will improve with time... send me a email if u got problem :) I have lotsa experience with difficult baby, mine is defintely one.  Photo by Attitude Photography

Love Eric!

 

I must mention - all these nice and arty photos are from my very good friend, the ever young, bubbly and nice Eric Er of Attitude Photography.This fantastic photo was a one-take masterpiece, when the baby was wailing cos' we woke him up in our attempt to put him in this position. This pic is ideal for the toilet, and no pun intended. It is a MASTERPIECE!  Photo by Attitude Photography

Raising Baby - Raising Dog

What I said in the intro, about the similarities between rearing dog and raising child will indeed insult the throngs of parents who swear by the different versions of baby books in the market today. I still stand by what I say - look around you - the "shut up", "stop shouting (barking)", "sit down", "let's go", "stop", "don't pee there!", "eat properly" people use on their child is no different from what you hear at any dog obedience class. Nevertheless... there is something different about a child, your child - the sense of bonding. Can never forget the first day he was born, me lying alone in bed (wifey in hospital), thinking - wow, i have a child - that feeling is difficult to put into words, but if i need to describe it, it would have been "magical" and "breathless"!

Photo by Attitude Photography